The Power of a Pacer

I went for a hike the other day. My hiking partner pointed out various things along the way. "Do you see those wild flowers - they are fairly unique to this type of soil." "These berries are actually edible." What was amazing to me was how suddenly more aware I had become of my surroundings. It was not so much that I had a knowledge gap, it was that I had an awareness gap. In our lives, awareness must precede change. Awareness is probably best accomplished not by someone telling us something but facilitating our discovery of something. We have a program called CorePacer that takes this very approach. We all need individuals in our lives who can simply come along side of us and help enhance our own self-awareness.

The next time you take a walk - take along a friend and help each other explore what, perhaps, the other may not have noticed before. You may be amazed at what you uncover!

Ouch!!! Sweet!!

I listened to the discussion of a high school peer group wrestling with the issue of maintaining connection with a group of fellow students but then wanting to reframe the conversation away from negative talk about another student. This can be difficult. To have influence you want to be connected and nonjudgemental. One suggestion came out that simply expressing the feeling in the midst of the conversation with the simple word, "ouch", may be enough to shift the conversation. For example; Sam: "I can't believe how retarded that girl acts." Josh: "Ouch" Sam: "What hurt?" Josh: "retarded? - ouch." Sam: "Okay, hey, what are your plans for Friday?" We may not even need to explain...simply stating ouch let's people know that our words have emotional consequences. I know it works in the opposite way...we often give words of affirmation (oh yeah, sweeeet, awesome) without even thinking about it during a conversation. Sometimes we all just need some subtle feedback to improve our awareness of the impact of our words. Try it....perhaps you will shift from, ouch!!! to sweet!!